at least we are writing now.

let's be colourful this time.
no wait. that will mean i have to stop writing and change the colours. i can't do that.
is poetry being recognised more important than just expressing it? is any form of art, art, if it is not recognised? is that why we can sell art and be famous and those who don't they ain't artists because who saw them really?
i mean... do we have to shape an image of "art" like we shape a book or a pen or a paper or an eye when we say those words? do we shape word when we say "w-o-r-d"?
these are gibberish right? i never liked crowds but i like company. i like to talk about things i think about--- is that trying to sell my whateveryoucallit. i wanted to "grow" as a "writer" ... clearly i am not one. really as long as i live... the struggle to grow will make my life worthwhile. i don't want to sell my words. i don't try to create poetry to get applauds and admiration... i just write at times... i don't know why.
i hate to suffocate in other people's better opinions of what i do. i like criticisms... but i don't like it when you try to throttle something that my subconscious mind frames consciously...
i also almost always love to stay alone... hide in a room for days. is that normal... will you say that i am trying to hard to be something i am not? really... stop it.
i don't care anymore.
i like my pen and paper. i'll shape my own universe... if you recognise it and call it shit, then it is perhaps shit in your world;eyes or views. if you recognise it as art... perhaps it is art. and aren't you glad it breathes?